- Write From My Gut ~The Newsletter
- Posts
- Feeling like a PHONEY BALONEY
Hello! 👋🏽
If I didn’t scare you off with my Y&R rant last week, you are in luck because this week I will take a deep dive into the Adam / Sally / Nick love triangle…
KIDDING! I’m done with heavy Daytime Soap viewing for a few weeks… (I save time by reading the online spoilers!)
A quick hello and thanks to all subscribers for your support and feedback.
If a friend (or enemy???) forwarded this email to you, consider subscribing so you don’t miss future newsletters.
I started working on last week’s newsletter content two months ago.
I hoped my Y&R-themed piece would be the first newsletter post, even though I wasn’t sure how it would be received.
I changed my mind and went with something that felt more appropriate for my first post.
The idea of interweaving Y&R with a “life experience” still appealed to me, and I was able to make it work into my second post. It was super fun to write.
After sending Victor into the email universe, I became STUCK.
What’s up? What should I write about next?
And will anybody like it as much as the last two posts?
I started STRESSING OUT!
Photo by Luiz Rogério Nunes on Unsplash
Why was I worried?
I utilize various writing styles & formats. I enjoy exploring and experimenting. I guess one may say I have multiple personalities.
I am concerned at times that this will throw the audience off… even piss them off since they won’t know what to expect from me.
And should I care what others think?
The problem is… I always have.
This is one of the reasons why I stopped writing for many years. The fear of rejection still lives within me, even if it is much smaller than a year ago.
On top of that, I’m committed to writing one newsletter a week (to start). How and why would I consider giving up after just two emails?!
If I give up the newsletter now, does that make me a PHONEY? A FRAUD? A PLAYER? A horrible human being unworthy of creating word art? (... maybe even a drama queen???)
Photo by Bermix Studio on Unsplash
Before I got too carried away, I chose to reflect on what made me start in the first place.
I created this newsletter as a public place to experiment and grow while I hone my craft. No niche intended.
With that in mind, I had to remind myself that the content would not be like other newsletters. Not every post will be consistently funny, heartwarming, or gut-wrenching. I won’t always write about fear or love.
The themes will not always be about my cats, family, friends, Soap Operas, Sailor Moon, boy bands, flowers, gel pens, dreams, the Sun, Barbapapa, Canadian winters, The Artist Formerly Known As Prince (RIP), or so many other persons/places/things that fascinate me.
There is so much more to explore. I want to continue to write in the moment and publish what seems to fit at that time. For now, I hope that continues to work out on at least a weekly basis.
Today (March 2nd, 2023) marks 395 continuous writing days. I have maintained this streak partly due to my willingness to explore.
Looking back to previous journal entries, I spoke regularly about writing exploration and bringing it all together. Recently, on Day 365, I wrote:
Now that I hit a milestone, a major one, I feel SHEEPISH….
I feel as though there will be a day where I will reach a part of my journey where everything INTERSECTS and I won’t feel an urge to choose, it will all make sense where there will be multiple versions of me out there that I can make sense of…
Photo by Rainier Ridao on Unsplash
Do you ever have days when you question the path you’re on? Why is that a bad thing? REFLECTION (looking back) from time to time helps determine which direction on the path to explore. It took me a long time to recognize that questioning is only part of the reflection process. The key is to document your journey! Try journaling or recording your findings - what works, what doesn’t, doodle, take photos or videos. Create a safe space to keep (or share) these items. Use these tools for reflection. Find a friend or a community you can confide in for additional feedback.
Right now, this newsletter feels right.
I am grateful to have a network of supportive friends and family I can go to for feedback. And I have over a year of journaling content to work with.
I look forward to seeing where my path intersects!
Wishing you all the best in your creative journey, no matter which path you choose.
Write to you soon!
~Naddy / Nadine