A Ripple Effect

Last week I hit a new writing milestone. At each milestone along the path, I make time to review what worked and what didn’t.

The person I was 507 days ago is a different me today. Fear held me back for a long time from starting this journey. I started and I’m still going. I love what I am doing, and I can’t imagine my life without some form of writing in it.

Like rings on a tree, one aspect of life ripples to other parts. I see this when I think about getting back into a regular exercise routine (as mentioned last week).

At times, the ripple encounters stones. They are settled in and refuse to move. Water will always find its way around, but what about the stones? Will they stay fixed forever? Is the force so strong the water will move the stones or wear them away?

There are many articles, books and studies about fixed (closed) vs. growth mindsets. Many refer to both terms as opposites to each other. Frustration sets in when we want to embody only the growth mindset and dismiss anything we believed to be fixed.

Both mindsets need to co-exist in some form. If not, there is nothing to grow from!

Many times we are triggered towards, or revert to, a fixed mindset. Think politics, religion, and Disney live-action movies. All “heavy” topics where one’s opinion may be strong one way or another. When we feel insecure, afraid or threatened, the fixed mindset appears (based on our current knowledge of the subject) and may inhibit any form of growth.

On the flip side, a growth mindset is not as easy to maintain. I didn’t start writing out of the blue. I wrote on and off for years, stopped for many more, and started again after facing some fears. I had a fixed mindset about my fear of writing and the perception of earlier feedback. Each time I write, I learn more about my passion. This led me to achieve a form of growth mindset… about my writing.

Is it more than only growth?

Last week I wrote about the connections I see along (my) path. Beforehand, I shared the idea of how our dreams start from a seed (aspirations) and bloom into a tree. I want to expand on both thoughts.

If the centre of the ripple is my writing, and I want to continue to improve on and grow with my craft, some stones (or fixed mindsets) in other aspects of my life may need to be nudged or removed to maintain the flow.

It becomes difficult when physical and emotional scars are involved. If I was deeply hurt in a specific scenario, why should I force myself to have a growth or fluid mindset about it? There are also times when certain mindsets force or influence strong opinions on other issues or topics that may not need to be fixed.

There are challenges when it comes to changing one’s thoughts, but what happens next? I struggle with being labelled a hypocrite, fraud, liar or PHONEY due to a change in my thoughts or pursuing my dreams. I had my reasons at one time to take a position on something, based on the knowledge or experiences I had at the time. Life happens and time changes things. If I pretend to be who I was 507 days ago, only to please others and my old self, I would be living a lie?

Staring at these ripples for too long makes me dizzy.

I’ve grown in many aspects of my life along my 500+ day writing journey. I work hard to be more fluid with my mindset. At the same time, I want to protect myself from pain or harm.

It is a fine line I am willing to explore daily.

I am reaching a pivotal point in my journey where there are many stones to analyze and determine whether they should remain as they are, shifted elsewhere, or thrown away. I do not want these stones to have an impact later on in my writing journey. I hope they will be learning opportunities to grow rather than obstacles to move or hide from. And how much should I worry about being labelled a hypocrite because I decided to shift a rock?

I look forward to exploring these thoughts further in future newsletters.

Until then, embrace and enjoy your ripples!

Naddy / Nadine